Our one and only pic... ... Wish I had taken more pics with her... But there's no more chance...
I got the biggest shock after my last paper on Sat... ... Bestie and I were on our way to meet Big Jas at Koko's salon to do our hair... I received an sms from Big Jas... Was a little shock cos Big Jas hardly sms with excalimation marks...
Our conversation...
Big Jas: U finished ur paper?...
Mi: Yup... Why wat happened?
Big Jas: I'm gonna tell u something but u promise mi u have to chill ok?
Mi: Ok, what?
Big Jas: CHILL ok...?
Mi: Okie okie... Wat? (I was thinkin' I dun have bf wat, u can't mi telling mi u saw my bf with some other gals...)
Big Jas: I went to the salon and was told dat Koko has passed away... ... ...
Mi: HUH????!!!!!!!!!! (I couldn't believe wat I heard and dunno wat kinda reaction I should have!)
Mi: WHY?... I mean wat happened???.... Serious?? It's for real?????
Big Jas: Ya, they said it was an accident... ...
Mi: Wat kinda accident? Traffice or wat? Why?... Where?...
Big Jas: I'm not veri sure...
Mi: Ok, I'm my way there. See you in a bit...
I told Bestie... And starting crying on the bus... ... I just can't accept the news I jus heard... She is so young... Such a nice person and a hairstylist with lotsa future... I used to vision Koko styling my hair for mi at my wedding... But... ...
I went into the salon, saw Linda (Koko's colleague) when she saw mi she immediately came over and gave mi a hug... She tot I knew wat happened to her cos I was one of her regulars... It wasn't an accident... Koko commited suicide due to problems with her bf... Linda also wanted to find my no. from Koko's mobile to inform mi... But it was detained by the police...
Koko and I hardly tok abt sad stuff... And with my personality I will not probe into others' xin(1) shi(4) unless they start to tell mi abt it... I have nvr tot that she would do such a silly thing to herself since she always tells mi positive stuff whenever we tok abt relationships... If only I had been a little bit more kaypo and keep asking n asking... Perhaps I would have been able to help talk sense to her...
She left us on 18 Nov... I even received a call from her on 16th nite... She knew I frequent Zouk and asked if I was gg to Zouk dat Fri nite as she will be popping by... But I wasn't dat nite, cos exams are round the corner... If only I went... ... ...
We still did our hair anyhowz... I was tearing while washing my hair, while looking at Linda cut my hair, while choosing which Matrix product to buy... Every little thing in that salon reminds me of her... Everytime someone walks in from the door reminded mi of how she walks in after having her smoking break... Even the Jap magazine Big Jas was flipping thru reminded mi of her... Dat was the same mag that she flipped thru with mi when I finally decided to perm my hair last yr...
Suddenly, I remembered... There was once Bestie and I were at the salon discussing with her, wat was the best method to die beautifully... We all agreed on taking pills, cos the rest were either too painful or gross... ... Perhaps I should've noticed something was wrong with her...
Can't stop my tears from flowing... ... Woke up today and went to search for newspapers... It was published on 19th... And I found it!... How come I didn't see dat at all? It was on the front page!... It's really weird cos I'll usually pop by Mummy's table to chk out wat's on the newspapers... But I just didn't happen to see it... ... If I saw, I dun think I would've been able to study properly for my papers...
This is not cliche but really... Cherish the ones around you while you still ken...
I dun think I can ever muster enough courage to visit that salon by myself again... Perhaps not for the time being...